I've started 3 drafts, one every few weeks and never got to posting them cause I didn't have the time to finish em. But I'll try to sum up what's been going on.
I've been relearning Java and I think I just don't have the brain for it. I can do simple codes and mostly by copy pasting and just adjusting that.
I haven't been feeling really great about myself again for a few weeks. Sure I've studied so I should feel in some way accomplished but I don't. I want to be more but I don't have the belief in myself to pursue the things I want. And sometimes I hate having my future in a fog I can't see through.
Sometimes I wish I could change the way I think when it comes to relationships.
I feel like a little kid. Inexperienced and not knowing what to want out of life scares me. Or well, I can dream of what I'd like but dreams go to the distance of unrealistic. One thing I do know though - I want to be happy. But then again, who doesn't.
